Cookies

Okay so this post really has nothing to do with cookies except for a passing mention. I just ate about half a dozen of my chocolate chip cookies that I made the other night from a RECIPE!!! tHey weren't refrigerated cookies which I am very proud of! I might have burnt a few but...they still turned out fine in my books considering I fail at pretty much any form of cooking or baking!! :)

Yes. Now that that is over.

Don't you hate the feeling of being lost? That's me right now. I feel like I'm drowning and no one is there to save me. It's not really in a big way!! HAHA maybe drowning isn't the right comparison...hmmmm.
okay we'll say drowning but to a lesser degree. :) <--------- just so you know I'm not saying that drowning is a happy prospect, the happy face is just there because I'm clarifying...and it's a habit.

Lately I've just been feeling so ...lost. And jealous. But when do I not feel like that! lol I feel really taken advantage from actually on a whole different counts. Most of all work but still on other fronts. But you know when you try to say something to someone they either don't see your point, they think what you're saying is stupid, or they get it but they don't understand why you're fretting about it and they just blow it off. That's what it's like for me. And I don't really have an outlet either. I tell Bruno. That's my outlet! lol

Another thing that's been weighing on my mind is being a fan. I love being a fan of something or someone. The only thing is, is that if you get the chance to meet that someone or contact them in some way...I want them to reply, not as a celebrity to a fan, but to reply as a person. I want them to be sincere and do it for ME as a person not a fan. You know?

That's what it was like at Twicon. I just felt uncomfortable the whole time because I wanted to get my autograph for ME. I wanted to get my picture for ME. I wanted Allen and Craig to be nice to me for ME! *sigh* but it's not really gonna work that way is it?

So before I leave ...just another lil note. My videos are not working on this comp. I can't go on youtube or anything because I don't have the right software. And the thing is, I've downloaded it all but it's STILL. NOT. WORKING!!
ARGH!!!!!!!!!!

So yeah I must be going now because I need sleep. And I need to clean off my bed. And I need to ponder....yes...ponder.....

P.S. I've noticed that I am ************************************** :)